Out with the Bath Water

There are times when we get dirty, just trying to be clean.

I've been thinking about Bathsheba for about a year now. For context, a friend of mine showed me a TikTok (or maybe it was a Youtube video) featuring a content creator playing the roles of scandalous women in the Bible. There was Eve, representing the first sin. She also played Delilah, who fooled Sampson. Of course, there was Jezebel - for obvious reasons. And then, among a few other characters, was Bathsheba.

Bathsheba?

This caused me to pause for a second to reflect and her story. I could see how she would be lumped into a sector of scandalous women - but this scandal was not of her own doing.

She gets thrown into quite the plot, where the main character is King David. When you become a supporting role in a story where the main character is, literally, "a man after God's own heart," it's easy to see how she can be stereotyped and even overlooked.

In the case of that content creator's video, I can also see how Bathsheba can be mischaractersized. After all, she was a married women who slept with a king.

But whose fault was that, really?

Let's read 2nd Samuel, where her story takes place in Chapter 11.

King David should have been with his army at war, but for some reason he decided to stay at the palace while his men were at battle. One day while he was walking on his rooftop, he looks down to see a "very beautiful" woman bathing. He sent someone to get information about her and that man returned with three very important details.

Her name - Bathsheba

Her lineage - Daughter of Eliam (I'll explain why this is important in a few.)

Her relationship status - Wife of Uriah (This is also important. Very important.)

The irony of her name being Bathsheba and her identity being the woman David saw taking a bath has always been a chuckle for me. I mean, c'mon. If this wasn't a true story, this would be core foreshadowing in fictional storytelling. With that, I want to also pause and remind us...

- This is a real story. Not a parable.

We know the Bible is intentional with every detail it provides. Every word is on purpose.

So when we get the data about Bathsheba's father - this is necessary information. I looked up Eliam and came to find he was significant in the life of King David. Eliam was not only one of David's "thirty" mighty men (mentioned by David, in his last words in 2nd Samuel 23:34b).

Eliam was one of David's inner circle. His father, Ahithopel, was said to be one of David's trusted advisors (2nd Samuel 15:12).

Uriah was one of David's soldiers. Who was off in battle, where David (as King) should have also been.

After getting all of this information, one would think "a man after God's own heart" would take no further action. This woman is the granddaughter of your wise council, the daughter of one of your thirty mighty men, and the wife of a man who is on the battlefield for you. Leave her alone, right?

Nah.

And let's drop one more gem while we reflect on David's nickname. That quote, that heavenly description, was to reflect posture of his heart - held to comparison the heart of Saul. Saul stopped listening for God to guide him, to the point God removed Samuel from him as an advisor. Saul consistently stopped listening to/obeying God's command. David earned the title "a man after God's own heart," because even in his errors he still sought God through his mistakes. Even after this story, and as we will see while it unfoldsl

So King David now knows Bathsheba's status and affiliation to his camp, and proceeds to have someone else go "get her" (2nd Samuel 11:4) She gets to the palace. He sleeps with her, and two sentences later - she's pregnant.

Pregnant.

All because she was seen taking a bath.

Oh... Wanna know why she was bathing?

Because she'd just gotten off her period.

Bathsheba's father being in the upper eschelon of David's army afforded their family to be in a higher social status than most. Her even having a tub to bath in, meant they had money!!

The thing that afforded her the luxury to clean herself when others would not have that level of a sanitation or comfort (remember, folks were bathing in rivers, streams, and lakes) - This was the very thing that put her in the line of sight to be seen and taken by a king.

She was cleaning herself from a week of - y'all know - just to end up in what had to have been one of the most humiliating acts a young woman could be in. Remember, we said the Bible is specific with purpose. There was no line about Bathsheba wanting to be seen. There was no mention of her parading around naked. Her family worked for the king, it's not like they needed the money. No details establishing any ill-intentions of her heart, at all.

In comparison - let's reflect on the other "scandalous" women of the Bible from that video I was telling y'all about: Delilah was described as possessing a heart rooted in greed, treachery, and deceit (Judges 16). Jezebel was given much context about her character - worshiping false idols, trying to kill God's prophets (1st Kings 18-22). She even gets brought up in Revelations as someone who uses spirituality to decieve Believers.

All that to say, Bathsheba was simply taking a bath.

This leads me to ask you, "Have you even found yourself in a dirty situation, when you were just trying to be clean?"

I have more times than I would like to remember. I'll spare you too many details, but for anyone who can relate: I'm the was the kid who had an alcoholic father with a porn addiction. Most of my childhood was robbed of having an actual childhood, strictly fom what my father would fall asleep to on the television in the living room. We can fast forward my to adulthood. I'm sure unfortunately many of us can relate to being in a marriage where only one of us is holding up our side of the vows and promised fidelity.

There's a spectrum of places in life where we can have all the respect for compliance, do our best to maintain our innocence, and maintain other boundaries and still end up in a situation out of control.

And let's add the layer. The power held by King David. Imagine palace messengers come to your home and your father and your husband are at war. There's no one to advocate for you to stay home. No one to go with you to the palace. Is refusing the invitation even an option?

Maybe. But let's also consider the consequences of a "no."

Let's put this in historical context. King David's reign was between (an estimate) 1005 - 965 BC. That's about 2,000 years prior to the height of the feminist movement (1960s - 1970s). There was no "My body. My choice." No "No means no" mantras, and no laws protecting women, let alone anything given them autonomy of their bodies.

And let's not forget, King David was.... KING DAVID.

He was King of Judah and the King of Israel - at the same time. Not to mention, we already highlighted, he was the boss of Bathsheba's grandfather, father and her husband. We can give consideration to the potential impact of her declining the invitation and the impact that would have on her family and their livelihoods. Had Bathsheba said "no" to King David's messenger, she more than likely would have been dragged to the palace anyway. Where she then may have been held agains her will or could have been killed for disobeying the king's order.

Sis was in a lose-lose situation. What do you say to the most powerful man in the country?

I want to pause and apply some perspectives.

This conversation doesn't just apply to women who have been in vulnerable/inappropriate situations with men.

Fellas, this suits you as well.

Many of us have been in situations where our integrity gets called to the test. We knew the "right thing to do." We also knew the consequences of doing what was right.

It could be making money in ways the government would frown upon (or maybe your parents would not be pleased about). But you need to eat. You have bills to pay. You need money. It can be a peer pressure situation at work. I once worked with someone who noticed their boss as misrepresenting metrics to look good. The individual called it out to the boss, thinking it was an oversight or clerical mistake. They ended up getting reprimanded and cautioned not to share any more "bright ideas" to anyone else. How about this one... Maybe you were a kid, and saw one parent do something you knew the other parent wouldn't like.

There's a multitude of situations comparable to Bathsheba's dilemma.

The sad thing is, she did what was asked of her and still ended up in a really, really bad situation. Not only was she pregnant. But upon learning that information, the next thing King David does is summon Uriah (Bathsheba's husband) home from battle. David pretends to inquire about how war was going, and what Uriah thought of his commander.

Mind you - if David has gone where he was supposed to be, these would be questions he'd already know the answer to... 🙄​

My hot take on this is King David figured if he brought Uriah back home, he'd sleep with his wife, and the pregnancy would appear to be his... The Bible doesn't say this - I'm just sharing my thoughts...

David even sent a gift to Uriah's house and tells him to go home and wash his feet. What's interesting is Uriah does not go home, but he sleeps at the palace entrance instead. He doesn't go home. Never sees the gift. Does not see Bathsheba. When David learns of this, he summons Uriah again, to ask why not.

"The ark of Israel and Judah are staying in tents... Your soldiers are camped out in the open... How can I make love to my wife (while they are in the elements)? I will do no such thing." - Uriah's response.

Crazy how this man - Uriah - cares more about King David's men than he does.

By the way - the ark of Israel and Judah was a gold and wooden chest containing the Ten Commandments. (Super important to a point we'll address later.)

After seeing Uriah's loyalty, King David asks Uriah to stay another night. He gets the man drunk as a skunk and sends him back to battle. (Y'all... I stopped drinking about 18 months ago - but something I clearly remember is how unproductive and aloof I was after a night of drinking. And that was at an office job with a hangover.) Could you imagine having to go back to the battlefield of war - after a night of drinking with the King? Oh, but it gets better.

King David also issues an order to Uriah's commander to put Uriah at the front lines to "be struck down and die." So the commander does, and Uriah dies according to the order of his King.

King David put a hit out on his own soldier, after knocking up his wife. Then he marries Bathsheba.

Long story short (this continues from 2nd Samuel 11 - 13) David ends up being called out by God through his friend Nathan. Horrible things happen to David because of God's anger toward what he did. 2nd Samuel 12:10 is where Nathan tells David a message from God, saying "the sword will never depart from your house," (his house will forever be divided) because of what he did to Uriah with Bathsheba. And what a sword it was. Y'all, go read it for yourselves- I got a point to make here 🤣​.

With everything I just told y'all... It's easy to see how Bathsheba gets lost in the story. But let's call attention to the fact this story gets worse and worse for her. I mean, c'mon.

She gets lured to sleep with the King, while shes's married. Her husband gets called home from war, and he's so loyal to the king (who just made her sleep with him), that she doesn't even get to see him before he's sent back to war - to be setup for death. The Bible tells us Bathsheba mourned for her husband (2nd Samuel 11:26). I could only imagine the layers of grief she must have felt. The accountability she may have had. We don't get to know if she knows King David killed her husband. But the shame she must have felt regardless.

It had to be heavy.

In the very next verse (2nd Samuel 11:27) tells us "after the time of mourning was over," David brings her BACK TO THE HOUSE and marries her. Then she has his baby.

I know what you're probably wondering. Don't worry 'yall.... I looked it up!

The "time of mourning" in those times was a customary ..... wait for it ......🥁​🥁​🥁​🥁​🥁​

👀​👀​ SEVEN DAYS 👀​👀​

Seven days.... ?

I don't know about you, but if I were Bathsheba.....

I'd need a lot more than seven days to process all that has happened to/around me.

Especially before becoming another man's wife and having the baby we created from being forced to cheat on my now-dead husband ...

This poor, poor girl. And it's not like she can call her dad... He's still at war, and he works for the king. It's another Catch 22. And it just keeps getting worse.

Calamity fell over David's house. But luckily for David, God is, always has been, and - even in this case - was a forgiving God. He forgave David's sins, but because of His contempt, the baby Bathsheba gave birth to grew ill. As much as David pleaded with God, the baby died.

Yeah.. You read that right... David was forgiven, and Bathsheba suffered another loss.

I know we all know the phrase, "Favor ain't fair." In this case, and in the case of a great God... Sometimes that means watching the people who hurt you .. The folks who did you dirty.... You watch them get blessed. That phrase becomes an even more uncomfrotable statement, "Mercy ain't fair."

And you get a front row seat.

We sit here in 2026, with our jaws to the floor. Watching God have the audacity, to forgive those the way he so graciously forgives us. We shouldn't get upset at how David was forgiven.

If anything, let's take a second to see how in our own lives we are much more like King David than we will ever be to Bathsheba. Seriously, let's pause.

As I love to say.. "Sometimes we're Moses. But most often we're Pharoah." Let's talk.

How often do you make poor decisions, when you really should've been somewhere else in the first place? What lengths have you gone to, to prevent people from knowing something you did wrong? Who was/is a casualty of your selfishness because you didn't simply refused to obey God? Where have you directly impacted/forever changed the experience of someone else's life?

Right.

So before we judge David, let's be grateful of having this vantage point of how good God truly is. Because even with the awareness of this story and the many other mistakes he made, God still called him a man after his own heart. Remember, nothing is ever "new" or "news" to God. nothing takes him by surprised. He knew this about David before Samuel anointed him. It didn't disqualify him from being "a man after God's own heart," any more than hiding in a winepress disqualified Gideon from being called "mighty warrior."

Back to Bathsheba...

After the death of their first born, she and David conceived another child named Solomon. We continue to hear about Solomon throughout the Bible. He becomes known and celebrated as the wisest ruler in the Old Testament.

As much as David is continuously referenced, and their son is notorious for his wise decision-making, Bathsheba is never mentioned again. It's almost as if her story wasn't important. Like all she'd been through was for no reason.

She seems insignificant. 😔​

Until you read Matthew 1....

For those of you reading along in an actual Bible, the NIV version labels this segment of the Gospel "The Genealogy of Jesus the Messiah."The first verse of Matthew 1 says, "This is the genealogy of Jesus the Messiah the son of David, the son of Abraham."

Matthew 1:6, ".... David was the father of Solomon whose mother had been Uriah's wife."

The moments of Bathsheba's life where she had no control, lead to her being a direct contribution to the bloodline of Christ.

Without what she went through, there would be no Solomon, to be the father of Rehoboam to eventually being the bloodline of Joseph, who married Mary.

The same Mary who gave birth to Jesus.

Now there are layers here. So many. But there are a few I don't want us to miss. You ready?

1. Just because you don't get to know how it ends, doesn't mean it doesn't end well.

I feel like sometimes we forget we are the benefactors of the Bible. We know how stories end. We know who's coming around the corner. We get to see God's imagination and penmanship in retrospect. The characters in these stories do not.

Remember y'all... The Bible is a container of biographies, telling the stories of lives God created and guided - and those who did not follow Him. Bathsheba spent the rest of her days mourning the life of her husband (Uriah - the one she loved) and the life of a child she had through actions of infidelity to a man she didn't even want.

🗣️​🗣️​🎙️​🎙️​ALL BECAUSE SHE WAS JUST TAKING A BATH

But here's the beauty from the ashes... Bathsheba serves as a beacon of hope for us. That, we don't need to see or have a sign to know God is going to work it all out. We have a book, made of 66 books, where in every story and parable we see God work it out.

When I think back over my own life, I recognize in the midst of my most agonizing moments, God was building something in me. Or He was breaking something away from me. In either case, He was preparing a better tomorrow for those to come after me. I can see in my own child, just how much He has broken in me to prepare a better future for her.

Bathsheba didn't just prepare a better future for her bloodline, she created a better etenity for us all. Just because she didn't know that, does not make it any more true.

And th same applies to you. 😊​

2. You are never insignificant. You are not forgotten. <- I changed my mind, y'all. 🤣

I was going to talk about how God remembered Bathsheba in so many ways. How He didn't just see her pain, He sat with her in it. He used it to so something so amazing.

I was going to reiterate how He remembered her pain of losing the first child, and gave her Solomon in return. The most wise of all leaders in the old Testament. That is her son.God restored what was lost.

But I think a more appropriate note to have here is this.... (Cue the new Number 2, please)

2. How far are you from His Word?

Not only was King David away from war, where he should have been as King. He was away from where he was blessed to be. The Ark of Judah and Israel had the literal Word of God held inside of it. The Ten Commandments. The rules that tell us not to do the very things David did: lying, coveting his neighbors goods (literally, he could see Bathsheba because she was the wife of his neighbor), committing adultery, stealing, and a few more...

Something I learned from God personally in my life is yes - God is aways with me. He's everywhere at all times. But just because God is with me where I am does not mean He instructed me to be there. And if He doesn't want me there, I cannot expect to be blessed on that path.

For King David the Word of God was on the battlefield, where he was supposed to be. And look at the domino effect of what happened to David and Bathsheba because of it. Look at what happened to Uriah.

When we are away from His Word, we are away from His protection. And we jeopardize the people around us at the same time.

But as we talked about earlier... It's easy to see how someone would keep focus on David, while Bathsheba slowly goes from supporting actress to another extra. But God...

Again, this is not to downplay the horrible events and timelines of nonstop pain for Bathsheba. This is to emphasize the same God who sees our pain, is sitting in it with us.

He doesn't just see our tears. He holds them.

• Psalm 56:8 says, "you have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in your bottle. Are they not in your book?" (Which is crazy, because that scripture (that entire book of the Bible as written by David.)

So many chapters of scripture and books went by until we are lead to a reference to Bathsheba. Which leads me to a thought...

Maybe it's not abut when we are referenced, but how.

3. Your circumstance is not your identity.

When David first saw Bathsheba, we learned three key things he learned about her.

Her name. Her social status. Her marriage.

What's interesting i even after her husband was killed, and David wed her, she was never referenced as "David's wife."The Bible is very intentional with separating what happens to Bathsheba and how it describes who she is. Many things happened to her, but God never stopped calling her Uriah's wife.

We all have, are, and will go through a lot in life. But what we go through is not who we are. What we go through doesn't necessarily decide who we become either.

SIDE NOTE : Bathsheba's story reads something like a plot from General Hospital, doesn't it? (BTW - for anyone younger than most millenials, that's a soap opera reference. lol) But it's a crazy story. For anybody who's ever been like, "I don't read the Bible because 'it's boring.'" 👀​👀​👀​

Maybe you're  boring. Cause, hunny that was drama.

That was telenovela-level greatness.

That was REAL LIFE.

Like the lives we are all living right now. I want to encourage each of us in one area:

Our poor situations do not lessen our purpose.

In fact, to lessen Bathsheba's experience to what happened to her, would be to ignore who she was and what the situation evolved to become for the world around her - and after her.

It would be like throwing out the baby with the bath water.

And quick reminder: that baby, that "Son of David"...

Was Jesus.