Lukewarm.... AF

Yup... You read that correctly. And yes..... We're going there today.

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A few weeks ago I was at work, and somebody asked what I was doing for the weekend. I gave my typical response... "Mom stuff, definitely sleep in, and"... this time I threw in a bonus fact, "I'm gonna take some time and work on my blog a little."

That's when everything took a surprising turn...

"Ahhh, word." You got a blog? What's it about?"

I've always had a hard time, even today, describing how to word what this place is about. So I just said what I knew was true. "It's a Christian blog." I smiled and was ready to go into detail about my posts, things I talk about, all that kind of stuff. But the next question threw me.

"That's cool. I didn't even know you were a Christian."

WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!?!?!

I smiled (holding back my "but I looooove Jesus" tears), "Yeah... I am."

I guess he could tell I was a little taken aback by his shock. He immediately went on to say, "I mean.. I definitely didn't think you are a bad person. I just... You know.. Most Christians are judgy, uptight, and real.. you know... churchy. You cool. So I just never put two and two together." He asked for the link to this page, and reassured me that he meant no ill will.

I nodded in agreement, and shot over a text with the page info. When we separated I reviewed his perspective in my head. I mean, okay... I get it. It made sense, I guess.

But still....

My mind went frantic... How could he... How could anyone not know I am a Christian. I mean... ME?! I'm writing this blog. I probably have the best Worship play list on the planet. I taught my daughter John 3:16 when she was three!!! I wear shirts from www.GodisDope.com to work ALL THE TIME. Do I need brighter colors!?! Heck, I even drove to Tulsa, OK two times a month when I lived in Little Rock, AR just to join Transformation Church!!

To make matters worse, when I sent the text, I accidentally sent it to a coworker who more recently sent me a text asking for some other info. When I ran into that person later, they stopped me in the office. They were giggling about the misplaced text. "Thank God you didn't accidentally send me something else huh.... By the way, speaking of 'God,'"

(You guessed it.) "I didn't know you were a Christian."

Y'all... Lè sigh!

I had to do an audit of my life... What was I doing wrong, that people who see me for over fifty hours a week didn't reaize I was a Christ-follower? I'll admit I'm not the "loudest " Christian, but I alwasy thought I wasn't supposed to be. Matthew 6:6, right; "But thou, when thou prayest, enter into thy. closet, and when thou hast shut thy door, pray. to thy Father which is in secret; and thy Father." I mean that entire chapter talks about not doing good or spiritual works for the sake of being seen. What was I missing...?

It wasn't my works.. It was my life.

Being a "good person" doesn't equate to being a "good Christian." And to be completely real and transparent with you, and myself, the way the world knows who we are is by who we become under pressure.

If I'm only talking about how much I love God when I'm in a good spot in my life, then I run around like a chicken with my head cut off when things are going badly - that's the two extremities of being hot and cold. That's actually the combination of being lukewarm.

When we (Christians) think of "lukewarm" we tend to imagine individuals (outside of ourselves) who are blatant hypocrites. Someone who gets drunk on Saturday and comes to church on Sunday.. But what about the person who screams "hallelujah" on a beautiful day and "oh f..." when a storm ruins their plans?

I'm not saying either of these people are not Christians. Examples like these are both incredibly loved by the Father and could very well have a place in Heaven. To be frank -these scenarios are actually both me at one point or another in my life this year alone.

And that's the point.

I tend to try and avoid speaking on behalf of any group and/or demographic. But if you'll allow me a hall pass just once, I'm about to make a bold statement.

My generation of Christians loooooove preaching "Come as you are." We talk about Matthew 11:28, Isaiah 55:1, John 6:37, and the list can go on and on. It does. But here's the thing... As much as it is important to express and understand that "who so ever will" should come, it is not with the expectation that "who so ever" is not supposed to change along the journey. These relatable approaches to how we get people to come to the Kingdom are also not supposed to replace or distract ourselves from who we are inside of it.

Distract:

Look at those last two definitions.... "to provide a pleasant diversion and to separate or divide by dessension or strife." Remember when the first coworker said the reasons he didn't connect the dots to me being a Christian was because I didn't show myself in the negative stereotype of one....? After reflecting on that, for a long time, I also feel convicted that each of the points he brought up for why I didn't seem Christian also showed areas in my life and walk where I needed to do better on the other end of the spectrum.

Not "Judgy"

Yup... This is me. And noooo, I'm not about to make a Tupac reference - saying "Only God Can Judge." Oh.. wait... I just did. And It's true. :) If you are like me, you want people to feel free around you. The last thing anyone should ever really want is to create an environment where anyone and everyone is walking on eggshells around you. But it's one thing to be aware of when people feel like they can be themselves around you. It's another for them to feel like you won't hold them accountable to/for their actions.

"Love your neighbor as you love yourselves" is listed several times in the Bible as spoken by Jesus. When this scripture is quoted its more in reference of "make sure you love yourself," because you can't love other people if you don't. Here's an additional context, if we are truly following this commandment, wouldn't we also make sure we don't allow those we love to act in a way we wouldn't? I'm not saying to confirm one to the other. But if you're friends are comfortable talking to you or acting a certain way around you, and you know it's morally, ethically, and spiritually wrong - why would you not speak up?

I think we tend to not talk because we don't want to come across like we are judging. Or if you're anything like me, you just plain ol' wanna mind your business. But neither of these is an act of love. It's just irresponsible, and to an extent it's also ignorance.

To say, "Only God can judge" is completely accurate. But we must also operate in the stance that He created us to hold one another accountable. This, once again, can only be effectively done out of love. (I'll get to that part later)

Not "Uptight"

Not "judgy" and not "uptight" are cousins. If someone thinks you aren't judging them because you don't correct them, they may also think you aren't "uptight" because you don't seem uncomfortable around their actions. You can definitely be one without the other.

Uptight speaks to the disposition and the comfort of our character in certain surroundings. "Character" is who you are when no one is looking...

If our character doesn't flinch at the thought or the exposure to things not of God, there is something in us that relates to or possibly enjoys what's happening. This can be a result of being numb or still participating (directly or indirectly) to what's going on.

For me... This is alcohol and sex. (Yes. SEX! I told y'all we were going there today). Now even though the "not uptight" comment came from a coworker, this reference is just me being honest on a deeper level. (Just so y'all don't think I'm out at work talking about or letting people discuss doing the nasty... Nah, bruh). My dad was an alcoholic with an open porn addiction. (Like - he watched it on the living room television with the sound on at night).

So I've been exposed to drunks and sex very explicitly since I was a child. So as I grew up and became an adult, going out for drinks at any time of the day was not weird to me. Nor was the topic of discussing intimate details. Up until very, very recently if my friends brought up their encounters I would listen and talk with them. I never cringed. I wasn't uncomfortable, and they didn't feel weird around me in conversation. Given that as my background, almost nothing bothers me or triggers my spirit the way it might with another, lesser-exposed Christian. And let's be honest, if sex an alcohol (two of the most controversial topics in Christianity) don't bother you, it's hard to be "uptight" about anything.

But I'm not allowed to use my past as a deterrent for my purpose. And neither can you.

Psalm 28:7 challenges us to pray a very difficult prayer, "Break my heart for what breaks Yours." This is necessary for us to purposely displace our comfort level. We have to ask the Holy Spirit (and give it permission) to move us and sway our emotions to not be okay with things God is not pleased with.

Even from the perspective of "minding my business," how many times are we going to ignore the actions of those we claim we love for the sake of wanting to keep the peace.

The entire storytelling of the life of Christ would be removed from history if Jesus minded His business. If He never challenged anyone, He would have had no reason to die. The only reason the Pharisees were bothered by Jesus was because He never minded His business.

THINK ABOUT IT, Y'ALL. - We can't live our Christian lives with the adaptaion of Ebony's mindset at Junior's bachelor party... "I just came to love Jesus and DASSIT."

(If you got that reference... It's okay if you laughed. I promise) :)

Wasn't "Really Churchy"

I gave y'all my Christian resume with references above. And, well... you're reading this blog soooo YOU KNOW. What good is it, if faces I never see know I love God and hope to use my testimony for the freedom of others and the faces I see everyday don't experience that in person? True, Matthew 6 does instruct us not to do certain things in public. But (in case you missed it) that was an excuse, using a scripture out of context.

I was going to start this section like the other two, and show the opposite of "churchy." When I (or maybe anyone) thinks about that description, we identify someone who talks about God and religion..... a lot. I figured if I'm not "churchy" am I not talking about Jesus enough at work. And to be honest... I don't. But Jesus is not a name to really be discussed, He's a journey that we should be living.

When Jesus spoke in Matthew 6, He was not telling us to keep our faith a secret. He was directing us to not be Christians for the clout. (ooohh that was good!)

If you are going to give (your time, your money, your anything), it should be because you were lead by the Spirit to do so. Actions involving God should not be done for the anticipated response of the crowd around us. Nor should we worship in secret out of the fear of making others uncomfortable. Who we are should be an obvious light. How we carry ourselves through the good and the bad should be consistent.

Who are you under pressure?

I reflected on "who am I at work" and I'm faaaaar from who I am designed to be. I'm easily rattled and respond emotionally very often. I have the best of intentions. I'm supposed to operate a life that personifies "peace beyond understanding" (Philippians 4:7). And I'll be honest, I run around like Chicken Little half the time. My life, our lies, are supposed to show people why being a Christian is a good decision. Not just for the eternity we are promised, but for the lives we are living right now.

A Balancing Act

I took a picture of my lunch at work the other day.... It was two bottles of water, a cup of coffee, a cucumber/tomato salad, a donut, and fried chicken strips (someone brought me lunch not realizing I brought my own). I posted the picture with the caption, "Balance."

This is a reflection of how most of us are walking with God and our neighbors. I got my water (my living Word) so I'm hydrated. But I got my coffee (my backup plan) in case this salad doesn't give me the energy I need. I made my own food, but it would be rude to not eat what someone gave me. Or I'm finally living my life right, but I don't want to lose my friends by telling them (in love) how they should try to live better, too.

We're trying to BALANCE being Christians with being cool. Being "evenly-yoked" is not the balance of keeping the good and bad around us. It's not knowing we are good with God but not helping our peers, coworkers, friends, family, (whoever) to the same goal.

God will NEVER balance. We either allow Him to outweigh the world, or we let the world outweigh Him. Our actions will tell which is doing what.

For my coworkers to know I authentically am trying to live a Christ-centered life, the answer is not leaving devotionals at my desk, or coincidentally having my Bible open on my laptop when I leave at night. I have to intentionally walk in my purpose and on occasion have conversations that may be uncomfortable. Whether at work, on social media, or in real life - It's not about telling people what they can or can't talk about around me. But choosing where I am when those conversations take place. Telling my "friends" on Instagram not to tag me to the attractive man in the grey sweat pants, because I don't want that on my notifications. Little things that make big impacts.

We have to live intentionally. Where in your life are you living lukewarm. I can guarantee you, it's not always in the obvious places. And most often it isn't even something you are meaning to do. Think about the lives we are placed on earth to touch and helped transform.

We have to make sure (in a world filled with people who are spiritually drowning all around us) that we look more like a life saver than the fish in the ocean.